And infatuated be damned. He was near to being blinded by his attraction to her. He was in love, damn it all. He disliked her, he resented her, he disapproved of almost everything about her, yet he was head over ears in love with her, like a foolish schoolboy. He wondered grimly what he was going to do about it. He was not amused. Or in any way pleased. Mary Balogh
About This Quote

In this quote, the speaker is talking about the fact that he’s fallen for a girl he’s not supposed to want. He admires her from afar, but she doesn’t return his feelings and he has no desire to pursue her. So, he doesn’t. It would be easy to think that this guy is a total jerk and that he takes his feelings for this girl too seriously, but there is more to it than that.

The first thing we should notice is that he states that he’s not amused (which means “not amused by”), and not pleased (which means “not pleased with”). The word “amused” can also mean “liking something or someone.” While the speaker isn’t pleased with the situation, he’s at least not annoyed by it and an annoyed person would be more likely to pursue her. The idea of pursuing someone you you don’t like or admire is a little tough to swallow – even if you do feel some sort of way about her – because we often see this as being manipulative.

But here we see him trying to stop thinking about her so much, because it’s making him miserable and sounds like something you might do if you had some sort of disorder.

Source: Slightly Dangerous

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